As I’m writing this post, I am asking myself how is it even possible that I am writing about middle age? How is it that I will be 51 in a couple of weeks? It seems like the first half of my life moved at snail’s pace, but this second half has flown by faster than a blink! How?
Looking back on the last 10-12 years–the time I was in my 40’s and thought I was old–I have been reflecting on some mistakes I have made and that I believe many other women my age make.
We spent the first half of our adulthood taking care of our husbands and raising children and somewhere along the way, we forgot how to take care of ourselves. So that is where I’ll start…
7 Mistakes Middle Aged Women Make
- ME TIME! Until a few years ago, this was a foreign concept to me. I was in a 20 year marriage with a man who didn’t believe in allowing me any girl time or alone time. My sole purpose in life was to take care of my husband and children. I wasn’t aware of what I had been missing out on until after I divorced and actually had “me time”. Ladies, it is so important that we take care of ourselves! When I started practicing self-care by doing things for me and only me, I became a much happier, stronger person and a much better mother. It also enabled me to be a better partner for my new husband. (He encourages my “me time” by the way.) When was the last time that you took a girls’ trip or took a day all to yourself to do only the things that you wanted (even if it’s being a couch bum and binge watching Netflix)? If you can’t remember, then it’s time to do for YOU. Don’t wait until your kids are out of the house. They will survive without mom for a day or two or three. Get a gym membership, volunteer, get a massage, get a pedicure, go on a trip. Go do some self-care!
- GET OUT OF THE RUT! I am such a creature of habit that this can be very hard for me. I wake up, eat breakfast, work, exercise (maybe), cook dinner, sit on the couch, watch TV, go to bed. Repeat. Make the conscious effort to get out of the mundane. Routine is not a bad thing, but don’t be boring and let life pass you by. Volunteer, join social groups. Get out of the house! This has been a goal of mine this past year and because I’ve made a conscious effort to do new things, I have been blessed with many new friends. Heck, I opened my home and hosted weekly Bachelorette viewing parties. It was so much fun that I’m doing it again. I made friends of all ages and it forced me to do something outside of my normal comfort zone. Are you in a rut? If so, get out and enjoy life!
- DON’T SKIP EXERCISE! I’m preaching to the choir. My body can use more exercise than I am currently giving it. The last thing I want to do when it’s 100 degrees outside is go on a walk. I do have a treadmill, but I think it’s an evil invention so that’s my excuse not to use it. BUT, in case you haven’t noticed, the older you get the harder it is to keep weight off. It’s one of the sad truths about middle age and menopause. One of the best things you can do for your health is exercise. We all know this. We just don’t make it a priority. However, we can all find time in our day for a brisk 30 minute walk. Make it a priority at least 3 days a week. I’m not a health expert..I’m just being realistic with expectations. Move your body with some form of exercise!
- TAKE THE SUPPLEMENTS! Until a couple of years ago, any type of vitamin or supplement never entered my mouth. I didn’t think I needed them. I ate relatively healthy so assumed my body was getting proper nutrition. Wrong! Since I have been taking a variety of supplements my body feels so much better. My energy level is up, my aging joints and muscles feel better, my skin looks better, my hair and fingernails are growing stronger and faster. I could go on and on. The reality is that we need supplements to give our bodies missing vitamins and nutrition that it desperately needs. Just wait until you hit menopause, you’ll realize pretty quickly what your body is no longer producing. Invest in your health and take good quality natural supplements!
- WATCH WHAT YOU EAT! I don’t mean go on a diet. Did you know that there are foods that will help support hormone imbalance? Did you know there are a combination of foods that you can eat that will actually increase your metabolism and help you burn calories? Seriously, I never realized how huge this was until this year. I did a 30-day meal challenge in January that I had found on Facebook. The lady was genius and her meal plan worked! What are you eating? Eat foods from the ground. Eat organic! Avoid GMO foods! It’s really not that much more expensive to make this product change. You’ll notice a difference in how you feel and the foods will taste better! This doesn’t mean that you cannot splurge on your favorite foods every now and then, but stick to unprocessed, fresh foods the majority of the time. It does make a difference!
- GO TO SLEEP! It goes without say that our bodies need sleep. But, are you getting enough? I’m a big sleep advocate. Even in high school and college, I was in bed by 10 PM on week nights. I needed my eight hours of sleep. And, I could sleep in on the weekends which was a bonus. However, the older I got the harder it was for me to sleep in. Not because I didn’t want to, my body just wouldn’t allow it. Also, most recently menopause started affecting my ability to get a good night’s sleep. If you’re there then you know what I’m talking about. This is one reason it’s so important to balance those hormones! Our bodies need regulation for so many reasons…sleep is one of them. Give your body the rest it needs.
- STEP UP YOUR SEX GAME! There it is. I said it. My children will be mortified when they read this. Who cares! Life is too short to miss out on good sex! I should know. I spent the first half of my adult life missing out on something I wasn’t aware I was missing out on. Then I met my new husband and the sex was–and still is–great! Maybe this is a nonissue for you because you were originally blessed with a great sex partner. If not, I’m here to tell you that good sex can still be had in our middle aged years. Explore, change it up, try new things, have fun! You’re not dead after all. Refer to topic #2 above. Don’t settle for mediocre sex. You deserve good sex! Make a change in this area if you need to. I don’t mean find a new partner. You and your partner can change things up together. My husband and I do this all the time. And, it makes for really good sex. I REPEAT: refer to topic #2 above!
My passion in life is to help women like me make good healthy changes in their lives. We don’t have to repeat the patterns and choices our parents made. We are our own person. I believe we are capable of making our own choices and changing behavior patterns.
For me, this was choosing to live healthy–both mentally and physically–so my daughters would have their mother around to annoy them for a very long time. My mother died of breast cancer when she was only 47 (I was 24). We both missed out on a lot because of her death. I don’t want that for my daughters.
I make the conscious decision to live as naturally and as healthy as I can each day. Do I fail at times? Yes. But, each day is a new opportunity to start fresh.
I would love to help you find natural solutions that fit you. I truly feel that this is my calling in life. Let’s talk.
Live healthy, my friend, and remember that age is just a number.